fetching mother in law back from Singapore at KL, been staying with us for 3 days, she is showing us her ability to live on her own and wanted to live alone in Penang. We had explained to her that she can't do that anymore ever since the heart attack in January. She had been staying in KL with the eldest son for 3 months but ended up fighting with the son. The son was disappointed with the mother and asked her dun ever come to stay with him anymore.
So, she had to go all the way to Singapore where her second son the youngest daughter are staying there. She has been talking about staying on her own again. Saying that her time is near that she doesn't want to die in Singapore and requested to come home. With no arrangement, she keep on saying that she is capable to take care of herself.
Before the incident, the children been asking her to stay with them. But she said she lost her freedom if she did that. At last, she said if one day she is not capable of taking care of herself, she will stay with the children. But now, after the attacked, she still think that she is able to take care of herself. The children finding hard to make her understand. Most of them gave up. She hardly can walk now and feel tired all the time, yet she wanted to stay on here own. We are trying our best to make her feel welcome. But she insisted to stay alone.
We told her if she has heart attack again, no ones there to help her. She said she is fine, if she has heart attack, leave everything to God. The problems are more complicated that I can ever utter. It is just driving everybody crazy thinking of solution and option to purpose to her.
I can understand her wish because my mom is like that too. She just underwent a brain operation but she can only stay with her kids for a short period. I think when we are that age we would be like that too. The elders do not want to bother their kids. They do not want to lose their freedom too. Hard to accept but that is their wish.
ReplyDeleteCan't give any suggestion or solution. Just trying to understand them better. May Allah takes care of them.